


Hurt

by Valeks_princess



Category: The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Emotions, Fluff, Gen, PTSD, Songfic, Team Bonding
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-16
Updated: 2016-12-16
Packaged: 2018-09-08 22:13:39
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,470
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8865415
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Valeks_princess/pseuds/Valeks_princess
Summary: SongFic based on the song in the Logan trailer, Hurt by Johnny Cash. Obviously the song is perfect for Wolverine but I thought it could fit the Avengers team as well





	

**I hurt myself today**   
**To see if I still feel**   
**I focus on the pain**   
**The only thing that's real**   
**The needle tears a hole**   
**The old familiar sting**

Sometimes, not that anyone else knows it, Natasha and Clint have nightmares. Natasha has seen more tortures than her partner, has decades of pain from the Red Room which she won't to acknowledge or deal with- she downright _refuses_ to allow it to affect her, and her dreams overflow with that bottled up pain. She has faced much worse than Loki in her time, as has Clint, but for some reason the encounter sticks in their minds. How easily Loki tore them apart, Natasha has seen it before- experienced it even, seen partnerships and relationships be ripped apart by their masters and a few chosen words; yet she had long since relaxed- has stopped holding herself at arm's length and had _trusted_ Clint. He was her best friend, they fit together like one person, and Loki had seen that and _played_.

Sometimes, not that anyone knows it, they take time to wake up from their dreams, struggle to drag their minds out of the insidious loop. Struggle to remember that Loki didn't succeed in making Clint kill Natasha slowly, intimately, in every way way he knew she feared.

Clint goes to wake Natasha and is attacked for his trouble, she pins him to the ground, presses a knife against his throat and he lets her, talking softly- reassuringly, as she comes back to herself and sees his eyes are normal- they are not Loki's blue.

Natasha goes to wake Clint, he latches onto her- instinctively, his grip bruising as he twists her arm behind her back, threatening to break it; she didn't react, just waited until his mind caught up with his body and his grip turned softer, less violent, and she allowed it. Allowed Clint to hold her, arms wrapped tight around her, one hand over her heart, the other over the pulse point at her neck, face buried in her shoulder. Reminding each other that they had survived everything, they were alive and they were safe, they were together.

  
**Try to kill it all away  
But I remember everything   
What have I become   
My sweetest friend   
Everyone I know goes away   
In the end**

_"I gotta put her in the water" he put the aircraft was into a nosedive. There was nothing he could do. He was going to die._   
_"Steve" the plane hit the surface of the ocean, windshield shattering on impact, the cold saltwater hitting him like a rampaging tank, he knew from experience how that felt, forcing the air from his lungs "Steve"_   
_Drowning was supposed to be a pretty painless way to go, once the body stopped fighting the water in it's lungs, but Steve was a supersoldier- the first supersoldier, and he never stopped fighting, body healing itself even as water turned to ice in his lungs- patching over the holes caused by the newly formed icicle shards, brain screaming for oxygen. His leg was trapped in the twisted wreckage of the dashboard, if only he had gotten out of the way before the plane hit the water, and he couldn't free himself no matter how hard he tried. The last thing he heard was Peggy's strangled sob._

Steve woke, gasping for breath, body heaving, working to expel water that wasn't there anymore. There was something heavy pushing down onto his chest, making everything tight, threatening to crush his ribs. He clawed at his chest, trying to loosen whatever was slowly tightening, making it impossible to breathe, the muscles of his stomach contracting, bile rose- burning his throat, he spat it out, tasting salt water so cold it stung his teeth.

"Captain Rogers"

Steve ducked his head, shielding it beneath his arms, not wanting anyone to see him like this. He chocked back a sob. Peggy. Dum Dum, Jim and the rest of the Howling Commandos, all dead. They were all dead and he was alone. _Bucky_.

"Captain Rogers I have contacted Sergeant Barnes"

No, that couldn't be right Bucky was dead too, he couldn't save him and now Bucky was dead. There was a knock on the door, and less than a second later it was being thrown open and Steve was being picked up from the floor and gripped tight.

"Steve. Steve, I'm here"  
"Buck? B-but you're dead" Steve stammered, clutching at his best friend as if he'd loose him again  
"Not dead buddy, I'm not dead I'm right here"

  
**And you could have it all**   
**My empire of dirt**   
**I will let you down**   
**I will make you hurt**   
**I wear this crown of thorns**   
**Upon my liar's chair**

Thor was a veteran of countless battles, had spent eons doing the impossible and fighting the good fight for Asgard, yet he had failed his brother- his misguided and twisted brother who had given his life to aid Thor in saving his Jane, who had redeemed himself at the end. He had let him down, been unable to save him, had held him in his arms as he died. All that pain and hatred between them, the mistakes and lies of the past forgotten for that one moment, when they had been brothers again.

  
**Full of broken thoughts**   
**I cannot repair**   
**Beneath the stains of time**   
**The feelings disappear**   
**You are someone else**   
**I am still right here**   
**What have I become**

Bucky screamed, clutching at his head in agony. He couldn't see, his vision was fuzzy as if he'd been drinking, he stared at his hands, seeing double. One was shiny, why was one shiny?

"Bucky" there was someone there, a hand on his shoulder. He reacted without thinking, grabbing the hand and launching himself to his feet, forcing the other man to his knees.   
"Who the hell is Bucky?!"

  
**My sweetest friend**  
 **Everyone I know goes away**  
 **In the end**

And then Bucky came back to himself, staring at Steve.   
"Oh god, Steve. Did I hurt you? What happened?"  
"You flipped out, don't worry about it Buck you're back now, it's okay" Bucky hoisted his best friend to his feet, enveloping him in a fierce embrace.   
"It's okay, it's okay you didn't hurt me, everything's fine, we're okay"

  
**And you could have it all**  
 **My empire of dirt**  
 **I will let you down**  
 **I will make you hurt**

Tony felt sick, his breath was coming in short pants, he clutched at the arc reactor so tight the metal dug into his fingers. He imagined he could feel metal inside him, tearing him apart.

It's still there, still there, still keeping me alive. He thought, Obadiah can't get it, I'm still alive.

"Sir, you're heart rate is exceeding normal parameters, are you alright?" JARVIS. Right, JARVIS was good, JARVIS had always looked after him, he wouldn't let him die here, in this dank cave.   
"Sir I am contacting Captain Rogers"

Steve found Tony curled in a corner, huddled underneath a work bench. He pulled him out and held him in a tight embrace. Tony struggled; he wouldn't let them take him, wouldn't let them drag him back into the dark and beat him for escaping.   
"Iron Man. Iron Man listen to me" Steve used what Tony called his 'Captain voice' and the authority in it snapped Tony back to the present, reminded Tony that he was Iron Man, he had escaped and he was a hero. Tony froze, looking up at Steve.   
"Cap?" He asked, voice small, as if fearing this was just another hallucination.   
"Are you alright Tony?" Tony didn't answer, just buried his face in Steve's shoulder and cried.

  
**If I could start again**   
**A million miles away**   
**I would keep myself**   
**I would find a way**

They were all broken, in their own way, they all had their own demons to fight and triggers to avoid, but they worked together. They were a team. They picked each other up when they fell and carried them until they were on their feet again.

They were more than a team, they were a family. You could see it in their eyes, in their actions; the way Tony would import that fancy Tibetan tea just for Bruce, the way Clint would always have a cup of it waiting along with the coffee in the mornings, the way Bruce and Natasha would cook for them all. The sparring sessions that never went too far beyond heated. The constant suit and equipment upgrades from Tony, the movie nights and popcorn fights, the way Natasha would stick magnets onto Bucky's arm while he slept and no one knew it was her, the way they would never hesitate to throw themselves into danger to protect their teammates, who were always there to back them up.


End file.
